Jason Voorhees – a marauding musical maniac? Our favorite hockey mask clad killer backed by a high kicking Broadway chorus line? Yes, my fearsome Friday The 13th fanatics, this is really happening. Just picture the murderous mayhem: Jason slicing and dicing those randy camp counselors set to the merry melody of show tunes. Come along with us now as we explore the very despairing depths of Broadway horror.
Jason Does The Great White Way
Laugh Trek prides itself on merry musical stage fun. We needed to see just how serious all of this Jason Vorhees perhaps winning a Tony Award for line dancing could become. What better person to ask about all of this Broadway musical talk than the dance man himself – Jason’s choreographer.
LT: So much silly shit to unpack here. This is completely legit? Jason’s gonna be dancing and singing into our hearts soon?
JC: There’s lots of work yet to be done, he’s a tough student that’s for sure. However, before it’s all over, you’ll definitely be witness to Jason, in all his gruesome glory, dancing and prancing all over the Great White Way. Singing, that’s another question entirely. As you well know, Jason isn’t known for his remarkable verbal skills. We’ll leave the singing to the songbirds, and the killing to the deathbird, know what I mean?
LT: Oh yeah, right, the guy never does make many sounds, except a few grunts.
JC: We’re focusing exclusively on what an amazing athletic creature Jason is and we’re celebrating the sheer muscular power of his moves.
LT: Muscular? Yeah, right, sure I get it – as in tearing out and ripping up the muscles from his screeching victims.
JC: But don’t you realize that’s all part of his enduring, even cuddly charm? Isn’t that the absolute horrible joy of producing a musical with such an anti-hero as the lead?
LT: I suppose, but I also think that for the first time in the Broadway theater district they’re going to need ambulances and paramedics on call for the matinees alone.
JC: Jason Voorhees will definitely surprise you. Jason’s talent will surprise the world who thinks he’s simply a hockey mask mooch. He’s not all doom and gloom and blood. Well, wait a minute, actually, yeah he’s definitely all about the blood. Pretty amazing how much one guy can attract gallons of blood to him. It’s a rare talent, I guess.
LT: Yeah, a unique talent indeed. So when is this happening and what’s the working name for the show? Do we get any more inside info about the Jason Voorhees development?
JC: Jason’s show is now called: Friday The 13th – Dance, Sing and Slice Your Ass Off. Yes, I know it’s a really subtle title, but we’re still working on all of that marketing.