Thor got fat. Widen your door for chubby Thor, cause he waddles as a certified fatty fatty two by four. Got that fat fact? Our fabled champion of Midgard crushes the heavenly scales these days. At least he’s a helluva lot fatter than his usual buff Asgardian self. They’re gonna rename Avengers: Endgame to Avengers: Eat-Game. Too many hammer smashes at Odin’s royal buffet have blimped up roaring godly Goldilocks. Netflix, who never shirks or shrinks away from a fattened calf opportunity, will feature Fat Thor in a breezy new sitcom.
Mischievous Loki floats off joyously about the cosmos. Wherever he is, you gotta know, he beams with a sadistic smile all the while.
We All Roar For More Fat Thor
Laugh Trek sat down with the coolly clever, culinary creatives behind Fat Thor. In between throwing back a few brews and bowls of high caloric snacks, we just hadda chew the fat on all the show running skinny.
Fat Thor. It just rolls off the tongue, which of course, if Thor has been doing anything lately, it involves lotsa tongue action.
Yes – eating and drinking like a pig! More Thor! We Gonna Roar For More Thor!
Yup. Indeed. We got it but good. That’s a real catchy tagline. What’s the meat on the big man?
He’s the delicious hero we all want to eat – as in a great, big fat juicy greasy hero sandwich! (laughing)
Wowerz. This is like pulling teeth, but we’re getting no ice cream or lollipop afterwards as reward.
Thor’s got the best teeth in the entire galaxy – did you know his choppers just shine real fine?
Really, how’s that working out for him, considering the fat ass of Asgard is always stuffing his fat face now?
Hey now! That’s not gonna work well with us at all! You’re fat shaming! See here, Laughing Track, we won’t take such offense in this overly enlightened day and age. It’s a whole new shiny era, and you know what? It’s equality for all! And we’re all on that good stuff, equal equating balancing thingy for all.
Even for fat asses?
Especially for fat asses! (burps thunderously)
Speaking of asses made mostly of fat… Honestly, how much of a fatso is Thor now? Are we talking 250 lbs plus?
Ya kiddin me? More Thor. Way more Thor!
More? Geez. Big man getting bigger. How much more of Thor is gonna waddle through our front door?
Oh, a whole lot more! Put it this way; when you create a show called Fat Thor, you gotta have a real fat boy play your lard ass lead. That’s our boy – FAT!
While there will be More Thor on our bouncy, jazzy Fat Thor, there’s much more to tell. And the best part is that if it takes off, we may just tempt other Avengers to GROW. The Hulk will become The Bulk. Black Widow will become Blubber Wiggle! Thor The Fat is coming for ya lunch, your dinner and dessert and some of his fat friends will join him. You’re all gonna eat it up!