Laugh Trek

Don't Wreck Yourself. Laugh Trek yourself.

Lt. Dax says, ‘My Poop Doesn’t Smell!’

Dax Poop

Perfume Poop

Lt. Jadzia Dax, veteran Starfleet officer assigned to Deep Space Nine, veritably proudly crows about her enviable personal hygiene.  Truth is, she’s practically taunting in her playful boast on the subject.  Anybody can take a speedy sonic shower or replicate a fresh smelling uniform, she’ll tease.  This is something far more impressive, organic and natural.  When she excuses herself to use the lavatory, there’s no malodorous worries for anyone within sniffing distance.  When finally pressed on it, Dax speaks plainly, “How’s this for way too much information? My poop smell is like perfume. Yep, people, my shit doesn’t smell!”

A Shrill Thrill For Trill Fans

Let’s face it – it’s a truly surreal galaxy, what Starfleet and the UFP has so far explored and documented.

Aliens physiology can challenge our sense of our place in the cosmos.  The bizarre anatomy of many alien races blows the mind and warps the senses.  It can prove beyond fascinating.  Just go bug a Vulcan every seven years during their Pon Far.  Lt. Dax belongs to the fantastic Trill race, many of whom are a joined species.

Dax Poop
Perfume Poop

Great, you’re no doubt thinking.  Love it.  But what does all of this have to do with poop smells – or lack thereof?

Shit. Let’s just clear this Poop up with Dax.

“Trill Symbionts process their hosts food – or should I say assists in that process.  In this way, Trill who are joined can assure anyone within nose shot of us taking a dump – you won’t get knocked flat.  In fact, you may actually enjoy the stink – because it simply doesn’t stink at all.”

Fascinating, as Spock would say.  And what if you ate with complete abandon – say hit a Pakled All You Can Eat Buffet.

“Darling, I’ve done Klingon, Ferengi and Pakled buffets all on a dare, and the only thing about the aftermath was a fragrant wisp of an odor.  Deep Space Nine brings to us all kinds of great edible delicacies.  Quark always manages to have some of the best eats and drinks imaginable. Trust me – the Dax symbiont scrubs it all ever so peachy clean and then some.  Now, are you going to eat that Talarian taco or not?”