03/23/2023

Laugh Trek

Don't Wreck Yourself. Laugh Trek yourself.

Vulcan Petitions Earth To Change Sputnik to Spocknik

Spocknik

Spocknik

Vulcan elders can be a predictable, logical lot.  They consistently engage in a steady practice of unassailable logic.  As one of the oldest and most respected member races of the United Federation of Planets, when Vulcan speaks, our Federation listens.  But changing the name of an Earth space milestone?  Sputnik to Spock?  Sorry, Vulcans, we do not understand the loopy logic of such a random sounding proposal.

Spock Overshadows Earth Space History

Laugh Trek got proactive.  We managed to get hold of the official Vulcan press release outlining the name change proposal.

TO: All The Known Galaxy

From: Vulcan Council Of Logical Elders

“Vulcan petitions the good people of the Earth to consider a most logical proposal.  Your ancient space probe, Sputnik, should go through a name change. From hereafter, it should be known as Spocknik.  The majority of Federation citizens are familiar with Starfleet officer, Spock.  By essentially merging Spock with Sputnik, we will promote the appreciation of space exploration history and remind all about the great contribution of the Vulcan race to this endeavor.”

Zany or Cooly Clinical?

Most of the galaxy doesn’t know what to make of this petition, but since it has to do with Spock and Vulcans, most are taking it rather seriously.  All are weighing it with an analytical lens, all except those rowdy and hard to convince Klingons.

Spocknik
Spocknik

We got this from the Klingon High Council, “Vulcans once again are attempting to sabotage the order of things.  Considering the complete irrelevancy of this ridiculous request, it amuses us to no end.  However, it’s a tri-tanium example of the level of intrusiveness they try to project into everyone’s lives.  Meet us you spineless jellyfish on the battlefield, Ptak! If you somehow manage to defeat our best warriors, we’ll rename our entire PLANET after whomever cowardly Vulcan you’d like to suggest! Live Long and Prosper will become Die Quickly in Pain!”