Data, the Noonian Soong android assigned to Capt. Jean-Luc Picard’s Enterprise, rocked our galaxy today.  The always unpredictable artificial intelligent life form threw us all for a space time loop. Without warning, the sentient Starfleet A.I. space ace roared out of the chubby chaser closet.  Till now, who knew he even led a love life, let alone that Picard’s droid cyber chased chubbies.

Evidently, Data fell hard for an electronic B9 companion – colloquially known as a ‘Lost In Space’ Robot.  Indeed, the randy, digitally powered Enterprise D officer states emphatically, “I wish to share my romantic predilections with our entire Federation.  May my personal life be sterling example to others.  Be it known to all: I am proud to admit I am a hardcore chubby chaser.”

Data Calls B9 His ‘Chubbsy Wubbsy Bubbly Tubbly’

Laugh Trek prepped our crack wack away team.  We warped to a Starbase, where Data and B9 crazily canoodled for all to see.  As we approached, the B9 unit immediately flashed his lights.

“Danger!  Danger!  Will Robinson!”

Who’s Will Robinson and why are we in danger?

Data threw his arms around B9.  He quickly calmed down his rotund partner.  “No need to sound an alarm, my oh so roly poly love bug.  We were expecting this highly inquisitive journalist. He will report on our uniquely romantic story.”

“Circuits overloaded.  That does not compute!”  B9 retorted.

Wow, he’s got an impressive vocabulary.  OK. You’re madly in love. Why couple with less sophisticated hardware?  Simply can’t resist his infinitely chubby circuit boards?

Data nodded, “Your assessment demonstrates merit.  While it is possible for me to romance any number of Federation or non Federation world artificial lifeforms, B9’s scrumptious round chubbiness makes my positron positronic brain buzz with android lust.  You could say I have steamy, artificial hots for the gargantuan allure of B9’s enormous rear end.”

“Perimeter Invasion Alert!  Intruder Approaches!  Intruder Alert!  Rear Intrusion Imminent!” blared B9 thunderously.

Laugh Trek then witnessed a horny android romancing a robot.  Needless to say, it was memorable.  Data reassured his chubbsy wubbsy bubbly tubbly.  “No perimeter intrusion yet my rolling, rotund rapture, but I promise you quite soon.  The Sons of the Prophet were Valiant and Bold, and Quite Unaccustomed To Fear… La La La…”