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Samwise Gamgee Says, ‘Mister Frodo Is No Dodo!’

Frodo Is No Dodo

Frodo Is No Dodo

Samwise Gamgee wants you to know a vitally important fact:  His beloved Mister Frodo is no dodo. The rotund hobbit impresses us as a halfling on a quest of a mission:  He’s going to clear up any ill winds or corky confusion about his bosom buddy, one Frodo Baggins of the Shire.  Frodo’s Sam simply won’t stand for anything which approaches mockery or humiliation targeting his best friend.

Gandalf the Grey or Gandalf the White – is Samwise bugging, or is the pleasantly plump halfling right?

Fellowship Is Friendship

“Darn my old, worn and smelly socks!  He’s my friend and he ain’t no blooming dodo!  While we’re at it, he’s not some bloody bozo either!  What’s become of this tops turvy world which my heroic Mister Frodo risked his life to save?  Folk have no manners. They have the raw nerve of an olyphant calling my friend anything but Sir or Mister or anything less than the grand respect he’s well earned and so richly deserves!”

Frodo Is No Dodo
Frodo Is No Dodo

Where is all this blazing animosity coming from?  Middle Earth’s pretty tranquil lately. The One Ring’s been destroyed.  Sauron and his puppet Saruman, the evil wizard, have been dealt with most handily.  They are no more. Where’s the toxic stress hating originating from?

“Where in blazes does this particular hateful pond scum come from?  Beats the hellish heck outta me. But nobody messes with My Frodo! Maybe that dirty stinker Gollum is somehow behind it all.  Perhaps an evil spell’s been cast. All I know is that it’ll stop. It will surely stop just as an Orc’s squashed and finely punctured head stops a charmed Elven arrow in flight.”