Starfleet Academy announced some warp powered changes today. The highly respected galactic school will expand its already complex course selections and degree program by going university. Starfleet University or Star Trek University is the working title. The curriculum expansion promises to help all students go boldly, to seek out new life changing careers and new civilized ways of conducting themselves within our society as a noble citizen of the United Federation of Planets.
Welcome Cadet To: Star Trek University
Starfleet Command sent us a few stellar thoughts on their new and exciting educational forum, “Academies are fine, and ours at Starfleet has served us well, ever since the first warp capable vessels rolled off the assembly lines. But today’s UFP citizen and aspiring starship captain need much more. Welcome to Star Trek University.”
It all sounds great, but we wondered: How does Star Trek U differ significantly from the good old Academy mentoring and educational offerings?
“The Academy focused on the hard sciences, on command structure on say Kobayashi Maru scenarios. All well and good, but what about Tribble raising? Tribbles are a cheap and effective WMD against Klingons. We need more Tribble breeders. How about Betazoid telepathy techniques? How you avoid them and how you fight back against nosey and annoying telepahts. There’s a full course at Star Trek U where we immerse our students in alien erotica – Delta sexual customs. I may take that one myself!”, explained SC PR officer.
Other courses which have already become popular in the pre-sign up process are: Spock Rock, where a certain Vulcan science officer teaches rock n roll music to his amazed students, Sulu-Fu, where one of our alum teaches you all about flashy swordplay, and Discover Good Pizza, with Starship Discovery helping a class prepare, cook and slice up pizza pies. There’s really something for everyone and even everything at Star Trek University, so enroll, and live long and study.